Friday, August 20, 2010

How to help a freind?

ok my freind is having issues not with me but forgetting a freind who is messing up her life how can i solve this i need it to stop!!How to help a freind?
Your friend is the one that needs to make the choice to stop the harmful relationship. I'm sorry but it isn't for you to decide. Friendship is not controlling others. However, you may be able to influence her decision to avoid spending time %26amp; being influenced by the person. Stay close to her, allow her to confide in you, %26amp; give her positive feedback. By that I mean instead of saying negative things about the person who is a bad influence on her (you may have already made your feelings known), but by saying positive things about what good choices there may be for her. Maybe try to get her involved in positive activities. Be a good role model. Be respectful to her about her feelings about this other person. Give her the space to have whatever feelings she may have, regardless of how you feel. Be a good listener. Allow her time to process her feelings in her own way. She may experience grief at the loss of the other friendship. You sound like you are very concerned for her. Make sure that she knows that you will be there for her no matter what her decision is, but stand firm that you won't partake in what ever toxicity that she is allowing the other person to subject her to. State your feelings as fact, without any drama, then allow her to decide what choices she'll make. Remember that neither of you are responsible for the others' feelings. Take good care of your own feelings as well. You may get your feelings hurt by her decisions. Allow yourself to take care of those feelings. You may need to distance yourself from your friend a bit to take care of you. Nurture your loving nature. Be wise %26amp; remember that we all have our own path to walk. Best wishes to you %26amp; to your friend who is fortunate to have you walking with her.

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